The Ten Commandments of going to a New Jersey diner

As the diner capital of the world, New Jerseyans are passionate about diners.

We know that what makes a great diner is far beyond the food that’s offered. It’s about the vibe.

In order to get the full Jersey diner experience, there are rules that one must abide by.

New Jersey diner Ten Commandments

Michael Loccisano, Getty Images

Thou shalt respect the booth held together by duct tape

Those classic red booths have likely been around longer than you have. Sure, at best they’re held together by duct tape, but they get the job done. Give them the reverence they deserve.

Thine counter mints must be 20 years old and a little dusty

Does anyone actually eat the mints that you see in a small bowl at the counter where you pay? No.

Will I feel a sense of loss if I don’t see them there? Absolutely.

Thou shalt accept that thine coffee will be a little stale

Not offensively stale. It’s totally drinkable. But you can tell that it’s been sitting in the pot for a while.

Thou shalt accept the ketchup smudge on your menu that is older than half of the staff members

The smudge usually doesn’t block anything important; you can still read the menu, but it sits right there in the corner of the page, and you can tell no one has ever bothered cleaning it.

Waitress in Phoenix Arizona Diner

Thou shalt welcome being referred to as 'darlin’' or 'hun' by thine waitress

If I’m ever referred to as “ma’am” in a diner, I’ll know I’ve offended my server. The diner love language is using “babe,” “hun,” or “darlin’.”

Thou shalt accept that the server calls it 'pork roll' when you think it’s 'Taylor Ham'

Your waitress may call you “hun,” but never correct her on the breakfast meat, or you’ll see her Jersey attitude come out.

Thou shalt pick a crowd favorite on the juke box

Pick a crowd pleaser like Journey’s “Don’t Stop Believin’,” then check to see if anyone in the diner is looking around suspiciously like they’re in the finale of "The Sopranos."

Thine menu must have one outrageous item, like lobster, and you must refrain from ordering it

You question the person who would order it, but you respect the chef for having it at the ready.

Michael Loccisano, Getty Images

Thou shalt admire the dessert display

Those cakes and pies aren’t behind that glass just to be ignored.

Thou shalt ignore the dead fly on the edge of the table

Unlike the dessert display, we’re just going to pretend like the fly isn’t there. It’s probably been there for days. At this point, it’s just as much his booth as it is yours.

Go forth to your favorite Jersey diner and remember these most holy rules.

The post above reflects the thoughts and observations of New Jersey 101.5's Kylie Moore. Any opinions expressed are Kylie's own. You can follow Kylie on Instagram.

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